Animals
by MonkeyMojo
Summary: So far, Roberto's point of view from The Room Of Doom.


**The Animals We Love To Feel Sorry For**

**Chapter One: Roberto**

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**Just a warning: You may want to read Room Of Doom first...**

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I don't know how it all went so wrong...

I was at home, asleep by a rock, when I heard it. The two legged abomination that was a human came crashing through the brush, waving a net around like it was a sword that could protect him.

He should have known by now. Nothing can protect that man from himself...

He spun around twice before finally whacking himself in the face with the net. The strangest mating dance I had ever seen out here... Another human came and stood beside him and said, "Watch it, you idiot! We just need to catch an animal and get out of here. Stop dancing!" He growled angrily and said, "We've been searching for weeks! Are you sure Aro said it would be here? Why not just go to a zoo?"

"Silly Marcus! I know where the animal is! I was just having some fun with you!" the first man said happily, "Weeks and still you didn't suspect..."

The one that was called Marcus growled very loudly this time and yelled, "You _knew_ this whole time, Juicy?! Where is it?! Why didn't you tell me, you imbecile?!"

The first man, Juicy, said, "Because we didn't really need it until today..."

"WHAT?! I could've been doing more important things!"

"Like what? Your nails?"

"AARGH!" Marcus moved to attack him, but before he could, Juicy pointed at my rock and said, "There it is..."

They began moving towards my rock. I was busy wondering why on earth they would want a boulder when I was very suddenly lifted off of the ground. It shocked me that they were able to pick me up... I was not a small tortoise anymore. I yelled, "Unhand me, scoundrels!" but being human... or at least semi-human, their minds were tiny and could not understand. Either that or they were ignoring me... the nerve of some people.

They lifted a strange light brown object and put me in it. The sides were shut and it was dark... but not quiet. And it was not a particularly smooth ride, either... I would need to voice my complaints to that 'Juicy' person...

I eventually fell asleep. Hard to imagine, I know, but still... You'll be glad to know, I had lovely dreams. There's this beautiful tortoise that lives over by the pond and... But that's not important now... What's important is what happened when I awoke.

I awoke with a start as the box jarringly hit the ground. The flaps were opened and I took this opportunity to make an escape. I walked out as fast as I could... I was doing it! I was going to get away!

At least, that's what I was thinking until the crazy one, Juicy, came over to me, picked me up, and put me back down even further away from escape than I already was. I was about to try running again when I noticed that there were quite a few people in the room... all staring right at me. I tried to listen to what they were saying, which was a bit difficult since they were talking very fast... but I managed. I am a tortoise after all.

"...Well, I can't tell you that yet. Just a moment," said a voice I knew well by now. Juicy bent down and picked me up, raising my leg to his face.

My first thought was,_ Ew, what a weirdo, he wants to smell me!?_ But soon after my thoughts turned more to, _Ow. Ow, ow, ow, ow… OW!_

None of them seemed to care at all! In fact most of them were wondering what I _tasted_ like! Disgusting beings, all of them!

After that, most thought was abandoned as the pain took over… I don't know how long it took for it to go away, but it couldn't have been very long seeing as they were all still there after I recovered slightly. As I regained the ability to hear, I caught the end of what Juicy was saying. "…vampire Roberto!"

That shocked me. First of all, how in the world did he know my name? But more importantly,_ vampire_?! And maybe the most important… why did he bite me? It is not very nice to bite… In fact, it's not nice at all…

As I was caught up in my thoughts, the rest of the… vampires, as I now knew them to be, had been conversing amongst themselves… I caught the word 'feelings'. Juicy turned me to face him and said, "I'm sorry Roberto. Will you forgive me?"

I shrugged. Well, as much as a tortoise can shrug. It seemed to work though, since he turned to the others and started yet another conversation with them. Why wouldn't he put me down? And why was my throat so dry? Painfully dry… it was starting to aggravate me…

Finally, he put me down. I took off as fast as I could.

And ran straight into the wall.

When did I get so fast? Or was the room just really small?

I was shocked out of my wonderings as one of them lunged at me. I took off towards the other wall, more vampires chasing after. Crashes sounded all around me. I ran until I couldn't run any more. I was cornered.

I was about to make a run for it when I saw her. The most beautiful animal I had ever seen. And— I gasped. One of the female vampires was _standing_ on her! I growled and ran towards the offending black haired vampire. She shrieked and ran as the others yelled at her. As well they should! She was practically wearing her as… _shoes_! She suddenly turned and somehow ended up on top of me.

I freaked and started spinning in circles.

Mother always said I didn't handle stress well…

I was suddenly lifted up by the blond one.

He shouted in triumph and the black haired one and I were both suddenly in a different room. It was bigger and had lots of shiny buttons… which distracted me from the shoes… which I now realized were indeed shoes… I had mistaken them for a squirrel…

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**Well, here is Roberto's point of view for his chapter in the Room Of Doom. I may do more, but I'm still not sure...**


End file.
